You know how sometimes someone can just infuriate you regularly enough that you stay at the simmer point with them?
I know boiling water is a cliché, but it's the best analogy. It's astounding to me how you can go through your day not realizing that with a particular person you are at a steady simmer. And the smallest thing can ratchet you up to where the anger bubbles break the surface.
But you simmer. And say they are maybe in some sort of position in your life which means you can't just tell them off, even if it would feel so awesome in the moment. And when you are tempted to do that, you thankfully have the ability to stop and remind yourself that you like to be able to pay your bills.
Maybe you get to a point where everything about him or her and the situation makes you angry? And so you lose the perspective to decide whether you should sit down and have a talk about this one particular thing that regularly incenses you? Because maybe it doesn't merit mention in the grand scheme of things - because you know there will be larger things that do?
But you are so regularly annoyed and simmering below the smile of your surface you just can't tell anymore?
And then you are necessarily writing about it in a rather opaque manner, just in case? With lots of question marks, which are perhaps unnecessary but feel kind of good?
Yeah. That's where I am.