What do you imagine you would do if you left your current job?
It used to be that whenever I’d get sick of my office job, I’d think, well, you know, I could always turn to foot prostitution.
Since writing that long-ago post, however, I’ve been informed by a variety of foot fetishists that in fact, I could not. I don’t have the feet for it.
Which, you know, is kind of like being told that I’d be a bad lesbian. I want to be all, I would so be good at it! But, I’m trying to work more within my limitations. Plus my husband is completely opposed to the idea.
So the other night we were talking about what I might actually do if I weren’t in my current job. I was trying to come up with business ideas. One possibility for me would, of course, be freelance writing and editing. Which Nick suggested.
“What about something totally different?” I asked.
Because, you know, I spend my days writing and editing. And while I like it, I kind of feel like if I’m not writing my own stuff, why would I leave a good job to do the same thing, but without colleagues or benefits? If I do something else, I want to do something completely else.
“Which would be…what?”
(Nick, it must be said, gets a little tired of my existential crises.)
“Maybe I could be a dominatrix! It's not about sex.”
“Huh.” It was one of those, fuck, not this kind of random mental masturbation conversations again huhs.
“Listen! We could stop renting out our basement, and turn it into a dungeon! We could have different theme rooms!”
Nick just looked at me, poured himself more wine, saying nothing.
"Yes! I could be all, 'And here's the laundry room, where we'll be spending our next hour...'"
This intrigued him. "And then you'd make him iron naked!"
"While I stepped on his feet in spiky heels!"
"And then you could start a laundry service..."