My India is basically the cutest thing I have ever seen except for when Jordan smiles at me so sweetly and then I'm pretty sure I've never encountered anything more adorable and so it goes.
They are always the most amazing children I have ever laid eyes upon as I imagine yours are for you and this is as it should be and we are all correct.
India has started saying, "No, tank ou!" when she does not want something. And if she bumps into you, she will say, "Sorry!" in her little tiny girl voice and this I also think is the sweetest thing ever on the planet forever.
Just like a hippopotamus, she can turn on a dime, and when she is angered, oh, the rage. The RAGE.
In fact, I have a Very Terrible little video of her shreiking like a banshee, and I would happily share it with you but for the fact that 1. she is all nakey, and I fear that someone creepy might come across it while searching Youtube for naked shrieking babies, and 2. you might sue me for causing hearing loss.
But in any case, if you have ever been to Target and seen a kid on the floor of an aisle, back arched, mouth open, terrible, hideous, evil screams emanating from his or her mouth, you will know what I am talking about.
And if you have not, well, how nice for you.
So here is where I need some help. Because we did not and do not have this with Jordan. Jordan is a sleeper.
When he was small, I would sing to him and put him down and he would stick his little thumb in his mouth and put his butt in the air and he would sleep. He still naps on the weekends, and he sleeps hard.
He doesn't necessarily want to go to bed, but once you are in bed telling stories in the dark (which are now, as directed by him, about Lego Jordan, Lego Goldilocks, and Lego Sophie, who go on adventures and fight Lego giants. Yes, it is a bit cumbersome to have to insert Lego before each name and object. "So then Lego Jordan got into his Lego car and rolled down the window." "Was it a Lego window, Mama?"), he winds down and then he goes to sleep, generally without protest.
Beelzebub, on the other hand, is now infuriated by having to go to bed.
Even if I lay it out for her ahead of time. Every night. Because we have the same fucking routine every night.
"We are going to read two (or however many) books, and then we're going to turn off the light and sing, and then we're going to go to bed. OK?"
Every night, when we get to the bed part, even if she's fine when I put her down, she commences screaming when I close the door.
Sometimes at the end of singing, when you ask her if she's ready for bed, she says, "Bed!"
So you think she's all ready to snuggle in with her friends doggie and lion and graff and blankie.
She is, until you leave.
Sometimes she begins wailing before I go, and then I stay and
try to pat her back but she is all, "NO, ASSHOLE. PICK ME UP OR LEAVE
ME ALONE TO HOWL IN PEACE."
Last night she said, "Bed!" And then we got up to go to bed and she said, "Sit!" Which means, "Mama, plant your butt firmly back in that chair and keep rocking me."
And then she said, "NO BED! NOOOOOOOOOOO!"
I rocked her a bit, then went and put her down, and by that time she was kicking and screaming and when I set her down she really let me have it. No, I could not touch her. No, I was not allowed to do anything to try to make her feel better. No no and no.
She can maintain this level of rage for a long time. Like, over an hour. Last night she yelled for two hours. TWO HOURS.
If she hears your footsteps approaching, she'll quiet down. If you don't go in, all hell breaks loose. If you go in, it's all sweetness until you get ready to go.
And she screams and screams.
Then she falls asleep exhausted, and typically sleeps the night.
We've gone in and patted her, gone in and rocked her, gone in and soothed her until she was sound asleep. But the more we go in, the longer she keeps it up.
I am a cry-it-out parent, and I leave her be when she's having a tantrum. I have let her rage on many a sidewalk when she isn't getting her way.
But this is different.
I don't want her this upset every night. But I also feel like the more we go in, the more she knows that if she yells, she will summon one of us.
She used to fuss in bed, but not at this level, and not for this long. And then she went through a period where she'd be all calm and sweet, and sometimes even say, "Night night!" when you put her down. And she'd go to sleep.
We've had this nightly caterwauling for a good week or so now.
What do we do?