Thursday, May 01, 2014

Conversations in our household

Jordan: Mama, how did Daddy survive and marry you in all that crowd?

Me: Um?

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Nick: At this point in my life I have handled so many of my children's bodily excretions: vomit, poop, urine, mucus, blood...

Me: You know, I don't prefer the poop, but I can handle all of it except the vomit.

Nick: I know. It really gets you.

Me: I don't even think urine is a big deal. You could pee all over me and I wouldn't care.

Nick: ?

Me: It's not an invitation.

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Me: Jordan, do you have to pee-pee?

Jordan: No.

Me: Then why are you holding your penis?

Jordan: I'm not holding it. I'm scratching it.

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