The skies are back to sparkly.
Thank all of you for the nice comments and kind messages.
I got such good advice from several people. It was the kind of advice where you stop and think, wow, this makes so much sense. Why didn't I think of this?
Essentially, it was this. It's OK to be sad sometimes. It's OK to be down sometimes. It happens to everyone. Accept your feelings. They will pass.
It's so reasonable, isn't it?
I get all worked up when I'm in a bad place. I think the issue is that I get scared that the bad place will move in and take over. It's terrifying. Even if rationally, I know I'm not alone, somehow, I'm all alone. I'm sitting next to Nick, but I'm alone. I'll get stuck somewhere bad. All alone.
And then I have people say, hey, Lis, it's OK. And if you get stuck, we'll help you out.
It makes it all easier.
Thank you.
I was talking to a friend about something else, and I pointed out that we have a very strong socially ingrained bias towards action. We rarely realize that a viable reaction to something is to simply let it be... we try to fix it, or change it, or do something to it... we feel we need to do something... anything.
ReplyDeleteSo we hold on tight and fight our emotions when we don't like them... try to force them onto a path we like. And that rarely works.
So true. Sometimes you just need to feel crappy until you don't feel crappy anymore.
ReplyDeleteWell, I don't know when people started thinking that you have to be happy all the time. People medicate themselves and feel like something is wrong with them just because they are experiencing the full range of human emotions. Experiencing sadness and suffering as well as joy and happiness is all part of the human experience.
ReplyDeleteAnd the freakout is pretty normal too. Humans are programmed to see patterns everywhere (even where they don't exist). That's why people have a "system" for picking lotto numbers. Since all your prior relationships are, by definition, failed relationships, it's difficult not to feel the emotions that you experienced when you were in similar situations in the past.
There's a famous doctor that specializes in stuff like this. Check him out:
http://www.feelinggood.com/
I'm glad you found your way out.
ReplyDeleteThe thing is, whenever you're stuck somewhere and you think you're all alone, you still have you there for company.
And you're pretty awesome company.
"SO we hold on tight and fight our emotions when we don't like them... try to force them onto a path we like." This is EXACTLY what I do. Thank you, my friend.
ReplyDeleteWendy - Yah. And I suck at doing that, but really, it makes the most sense..
HIN - Yes, you're absolutely right. And I will check that out. Thanks.
Dag- Thank you thank you. YOU are awesome.