Friday, April 25, 2008

Purely coincidence?

I heard from the Dementor yesterday.

And here's the weird thing. I was wearing my emergency shoes - the ones I'd bought for a date with him ages ago.

I haven't worn them since last year, because it's just now getting warm. And so I thought of him, purely because I connect him with these shoes.

In fact, Steve had just complimented my outfit, and I'd just gotten done saying, "You vetted this shoe choice! These are the emergency shoes I bought for that date!" (And yes, he knew what date I was talking about. And he is a man who thinks about shoes.)

And then the email arrived.

Totally innocuous - he's in DC and can't come to town without thinking of me. How am I? Still engaged? Or married already? He hopes I'm well.

It's not that the content of the email was meaningful, but the timing was bizarre. I had been thinking about him, had literally just been talking about him.

Do you ever think of someone and then hear from them? Or call or email a friend, who immediately says they were just thinking of you, or just about to call you?

I feel like these kinds of things happen too often to be utterly random.

Nick, on the other hand, thinks these are pure and utter coincidence. You think about people regularly, but the times that it coincides with them contacting you stand out in your mind.

So I've probably thought about him a number of times - when passing a restaurant we went to, or something along those lines. But this time seems remarkable because he contacted me right afterwards. It's coincidence, nothing more.

I'm not so sure.


  1. I completely and totally agree that this happens. It's happened my whole life & I do *not* think it could merely be a cooincidence. It's been so long since I read it, so this reference might be wrong, but I think that this phenomenon was referred to in the book the Celestine Prophecy. There was some additional message in that book, too, which I also believe. When things like this happen, take notice, as there might be some message that is delivered or something that the 'coincidence' made you think about that you should think about. Maybe it's that you are in such a better place now, (and still wearing fun shoes)...

  2. I am in total agreement - it happens too often not to mean something. I am definitely in a better place (thank goodness). And I don't regret the shoe purchase one bit. :)

  3. I'm kind of on the side of coincidence. And I'm also nerdy enough that I'd want to chart out the random stuff on a graph to see if there was a pattern.

    Anyway an ex of mine used to have the charming habit of calling on Valentines Day, because "I was a special person in his life, and he really cared about how I was doing" (guy wanted an ego boost- and to reopen the wound) I have no idea how many exes got that charming call. He was a piece of work.

  4. I heart those shoes.

    And I agree, way to coincidental too be chance.

    I find that this happens to me too with exes. They have a radar or something.

  5. My shoe cousin used to work for Nine West a few years ago, so it's possible she designed those.

  6. Mary - Charting for patterns would be interesting. I definitely think there are patterns with exes - Valentines and New Year's are when they seem to feel the need to say hello. It's unhelpful.

    Slightly Disorganized - I agree. Exes have radar. These aren't the comfiest shoes, but I like them a lot. They make me 5'7" and a 1/4. Yay!

    HIN - Wow! That would be cool! And definitely a coincidence. Unless nothing is coincidence, of course...

  7. Shoe cousin? I would like to have a shoe cousin.

    I am torn -- the atheist in me thinks "Pah! Coincidence!" But then the trekkie in me thinks Majel was right, everyone in the universe is connected to everyone else.

  8. All coincidences are magic... it's just that we notice some magic more than others.


  9. A.S. - I know! We all need a shoe cousin! And one of the things I love about you? You're the only person I know (albeit not in person) who starts a sentence, "But then the trekkie in me..."

    VVK - That's a beautiful way to look at it.

  10. Oh, dear. Ahem. Did I say that? I'm not usually so up front about being a star trek fan. Apparently I feel safe here. :o)

  11. This happens to me ALL the time. At work, in my personal life, all the time. I am totally one of those ridiculous people that believes in fate and destiny and blah blah all that jazz.

  12. Sounds as if someone was testing the waters....and your ship had already sailed. Good for you.

    And hot shoes.

  13. A.S. - It just totally makes me want to hug you.

    Nicole - I half believe in fate and destiny and all that jazz. But it really does happen often enough to think there must be something to it.

    FreckledK - I dunno. I thought about the possibility - like, why not ask because I might be unengaged and...ya never know. Hugs to you.


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