Thursday, May 10, 2007

Stolen Wallet Addition

Because the thieves who took my wallet charged things to my credit card, it's considered fraud, and a police officer came to my office for me to file a report.

Incidentally, he was very cute and very nice. But unfortately, slightly delusional, because when he asked for my date of birth, he then consoled me on missing being a Virgo by a couple weeks - he was born the same year, one month later - and I had to correct him. Because Leo is actually the best sign out there.

But seriously. He was great. And he even went over to High Noon and looked at the store video with the manager. They called me while they were looking at the tape, trying to figure out what happened.

Anyway. Here's something very impressive. Those bastards charged $700 worth of stuff at Giant in less than an hour after stealing my wallet! $700! At Giant!

Isn't that amazing? One, how the fuck do you spend that much at Giant? And two, how do you shop that fast?

14 comments:

  1. Jurgen Nation5/10/2007 7:26 PM

    Oh, Lemon, this SUCKS. I'm so sorry. >:( Some people are such assholes. Karma, baby.

    Also, what is Giant's?

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  2. Thank you. It does suck. I realize in the grand scheme of things, it's not so huge. But still, huge hassle. They're assholes. Giant is a grocery store - like Vons or Ralphs for you CA dwellers :).

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  3. That is pretty amazing.

    I've had my wallet stolen more than once, and I try to think that whoever did it needed the money more than I did (but it's kind of hard to do that).

    When it happened the last time, I was in Philly and the cops that came to do the police report were cute as well. Not at all your "doughnut shop type."

    Yes, I've learned the hard way too, it's best not to keep business travel receipts in your wallet!

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  4. If they had used a BonusCard, it would've only amounted to $58.27.

    "Your savings: $641.73"

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  5. Sunchaser - Well, that's a positive way to look at it. Definitely a good lesson about the receipts. Ugh. What a hassle.

    Anon - Yah, well, no bonus card in my wallet. Too bad for Master Card.

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  6. When my credit card was stolen, I was jealous of all the fun the thief had, spending my money with abandon at the Towson Mall.

    Maybe your thief was once a contestant on one of those "fill the basket and race to the checkout" games like on Laverne and Shirley.

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  7. Didn't you ever watch Supermarket Sweep? Lots of hams and turkeys.

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  8. yeah, see, i know this is not funny at all for you, but now i'm turning it into a bit of a game in my head. how would i spend $700 at giant in less than an hour?

    if we're being realistic, there's only so much expensive cold/frozen stuff (those lean cuisines are truly highway robbery) that one could buy and fit into the fridge and freezer. so it'd have to be non-refridgerated expensive stuff. like...i dunno...the entire organic food aisle? half of the cereal aisle?

    oh, and the beer and wine aisle. that probably did it, right there.

    anyway, games aside, sorry about the sucky wallet situation!

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  9. Shannon - That Laverne and Shirley idea is a really funny image!

    I-66 - No, I never heard of that. I'm so pop-culturally ignorant.

    Kate - Yes, sucky, but it is actually quite amusing to think about spending the $700 on groceries in under an hour. That could be a good car game, don't you think?

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  10. I've heard that they buy gift cards and then resell them.

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  11. They probably bought cigarettes, which they can easilly resell for crack money.

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  12. Another tip (if you didn't already know this) is to always ask for more than one cab receipt. That way, if you lose any (for whatever reason), you've always got backups.

    (and I'd send be happy you some, but I'm fresh out of them myself!)

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  13. ...please where can I buy a unicorn?

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