I'll move on to other, non-pregnant topics soon, I promise. Or at least intersperse these posts.
In case you are already all, golly geez heckfire! Is this all we're going to hear about for the next, well, ever?!
But look at this. Look how little my waist was, a scant few months ago. Look how lithe and happy I was! I took it for granted! I didn't even think I was that thin!
Clearly, it's like that Joni Mitchell song.
I know I'm barely preg, and I've gained maybe a pound or two, but man, my pants are tight. Not just in the stomach. But in the ass as well. My thighs are pulling the material so my pants do that weird whisker thing. This! This seems really unfair.
So I realized. It would be a lot more convenient if I could be pregnant in my ass rather than my stomach. That would feel all kinds of familiar to me.
Because I am one of these people who carries weight pretty much exclusively in her ass and thighs. I gain weight, it heads straight there. I'm used to having a butt. I've spent years dressing to flatter a little waist, not much in the breasticle area, and an ample ass and thighs. I'm good at that.
This dressing for more boobs and an ever-thickening stomach? While still trying to manage the ass business? When that's expanding as well?
What am I supposed to wear?