Monday, November 15, 2010

The suburban scotch-filled bullet dodged by one Mr. Nick Gloria*

In the world-is-small way of the small world of DC, I've got a story for you.

A couple weeks ago I started looking for a part-time nanny share, so that I could add more time at the office, J could spend more time with other kids, and we'd have some kind of back-up childcare option for emergencies.

I answered an ad on a parents' website placed by a couple who have a daughter our age and live relatively near us.

The mom and I corresponded a bit, and arranged a time to meet. I forwarded the email to Nick, who, upon looking at her work email, said, "I've met this woman."

At which point I gave some thought to her name and the details he told me and realized that her uncle is a friend of mine. I'd met her before. I'd attended her dad's 60th birthday party.

We arrived at their house, and the woman, who I'll call Cara, took one look at Nick and said, "I've met you!" And I said, "I know your uncle!"

It was a little bizarre. We liked the whole family immediately.

Fast forward to this past Sunday, when they came over for brunch.

It turns out that Cara and I have a number of people in common, one of whom is a very dear friend of mine. But listen to this, because this is the best coincidental part.

They know Nick's old girlfriend, 6-12.

They recently had dinner with them. Cara's been friends with her husband for years and years. I had to ask, "Did they get engaged within 12 weeks?"

"If not that, then pretty close. It was fast."

Nick explained the 6-12 nickname. He said, in all fairness, that she was a nice person, and smart, but she had very specific ideas of the husband she wanted, and she found him uncooperative - because it just wasn't who he was or wanted to be.

For example: she wanted to change the way he dressed. Also, he needed to give up beer. Her husband would be a scotch drinker. She took him house hunting in Great Falls in the first few weeks, even though he wasn't interested in moving there.

Cara said, "They live in Great Falls! He had a perfectly nice house, and they sold it."

This made me wonder if her husband ever finds his scotch a wee bit bitter?

(*Uh, not his actual last name. He kept his own.)


  1. Kind of amazing she found a guy, and one that would fit her "mold." While I know a lot women think they can change a guy, it's usually not successful, or lasting. Time will tell, huh?

  2. Heh. Well, maybe he was looking for a makeover?

    Good for Nick for holding out for the real deal.

  3. Oh my hell. The 6-12 story made me giggle. I kind of love how not 6-12 you are.

  4. Wow. I guess she found the man she wanted: one with no balls (don't get me wrong, he might be a perfectly nice guy, but some men like to be ordered around, and he's definitely one of them).

  5. I bet the poor bastard hides in the garage of their house in great falls and slugs back a couple of beers everynight before he goes inside for a scotch lol.
    Me? I like with a brain and the ability to say no to me sometimes....but only sometimes lol.

  6. Just Plain Tired - You know - she might be just what he was looking for.

    And I must admit...I've spent some time trying to change Nick. Success has been very limited.

    lacochran - Or maybe he actually fit the things she was looking for. It's funny to me, knowing Nick, that she was trying with him. He looks the part, but his brain and preferences are so far from it.

    Hillary - I love that "Oh my hell" exclamation. And it's true - I'm pretty far from 6-12.

    Carla - Or she fit the exact thing he was looking for, and some of the details don't matter so much to him. I love to make assumptions, but I don't actually know either of them.

    Go-Betty - He may have been a scotch drinker from the get-go. And I like the ability to say no as well. But I like yes a whole lot more often.

  7. just goes to show there IS someone out there for everyone - even the craziest of the crazies

  8. That man, not Nick, was the guy Sam Kinnison was talking about. The married guy who's wife had removed his junk (to keep it in her purse or the freezer) and who was begging his friends to kill him. I can't begin to imagine what his life must be like. Probably just like the guy on the Progressive commercial carrying a "European Shoulder Bag."


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