This is an expression I've always liked, although I've also always thought that clearly it depends more on who your parents are than what type of edifice you were reared in.
But much like the wild hair/hare expression, I like saying it.
"Were you raised in a barn?"
Nobody ever says yes.
But anyway.
You don't have to hold the door open for me.
Candidly, I have always loved having doors opened for me, and while I didn't think less of men who didn't open doors while we were on a date, I did think more of men who did.
OK, so yes, I'm judgey.
I fucking hold doors open for people. Just to be polite. And now that I'm big waddly preg, lots of people - men and women - hold doors open for me.
It's nice. It's not hard to do. Why the fuck not do it?
And me, I always say thank you, and I always appreciate it.
So, you don't have to hold the door open for me.
But if I've just opened it, and am partway through, then you, preppy 20-something guy, you should not dart through it, all, hey, cool, she's clearly coming in and I need to go out and awesome, an open door! just because you move faster than me.
Asshole.
I freely admit that I think less of men who don't open doors. Or give up their seat on the subway to pregnant women.
ReplyDeletePricks.
I too think less of men who don't open doors, or surrender seats to those who need it more. It makes me wonder how long it takes the sores on their knuckles to heal after walking for a while.
ReplyDeletehah... it's good that you don't live in Boston. I think people here make a sport of NOT holding the door. In fact, i think they get extra points if it slams shut just as you are going to reach for it.
ReplyDeletei aso think less of men who don't hold \doors open. and i definitely thought less of a coworker who walked into work right next to me carrying binders and blueprints who didn't offer to help and then walked faster to avoid having to open the door for me.
ReplyDeletewhy are there so many assholes in this world?
I'm always shocked when someone goes through a door and fails to hold it for the person behind them. Shocked in a "ow, I was just brained by a door" kind of way.
ReplyDeleteTo be fair, barn doors are a lot bigger than normal doors, so going through them at the same time as someone else is less inconsiderate.
ReplyDeleteAlthough I will say that it does seem as though the ones most intent on appearing well-mannered and civilized in their seersucker suits and striped shirts are the ones who reveal the most appalling lack of consideration for others.
Hmph!
How hard is it to be a decent human being?
ReplyDeleteHard it seems.
You're totally right! 20 year old Tigger.
ReplyDeleteA few years ago my parents sold their beautiful house in Houston where I grew up and moved to a smaller city and into...a barn. There aren't any animals also living there and it's a very nice home but none the less a sore spot for me.
Sarah - Yes, pricks. And somehow in my mind it's worse if it's a man.
ReplyDeleterestaurant refugee - Maybe they walk around so preoccupied about their knuckle sores that they can't think about others?
Anonymous - Oooh, that would bother me evrey single day.
LJ - I wish I'd grabbed his arm and pinched it, very hard. Teach him to anger a pregnant woman.
mrsmac - It makes no sense. Why would you do that?
The question I perpetually ask is why are there so many stupid people, but I should amend it to why are there so many stupid assholes?
Susan - Yes! And when it closes right in your face, you're all, did that really just happen?
Dagny - True. Plus they don't swing so fast, so hordes could fit through before it closed.
And YES! The conservatively dressed you think they'd have good manners ones are the worst! Weinerfaces.
Lemmonex - Hard for a lot of people, for sure.
HKW - I could see that, and it would be hard. You want them to be happy, and live somewhere that they like...but it's hard to let go of the house you grew up in!
I guess I am old-fashioned. I think guys should open doors for women (and let them get on elevators first) and I give the evil eye to men who do not do this! And this goes double when you're pregnant.
ReplyDeleteP.S. I gave your blog some awards. I'm new-ish to your blog but I love it. My heart goes out to you!
If that had happened to me, I would have said "Oh NO!!! Excuse ME!!! This is what I'm here for -to hold the door for self absorbed pricks with a sense of entitlement. YOU'RE WELCOME!"
ReplyDeleteActually, that has happened to me, and that is exactly what I did. I have no filter.
I used to hold doors open for women. And then one day, during rush hour in a big city, some lady yelled at me for being an "anachronism", specifically, something to the effect of how she never needed men to open doors for her before and she wasn't going to start. It was quite a scene... so I stopped doing it.
ReplyDeleteTonya - Hi! Welcome! And thank you so much - that's so nice of you!
ReplyDeleteFreckledK - 1. I love you, and 2. you think and react much faster than I do.
Anonymous - Ugh, I hate hearing that. What's her problem??? Just say thank you, seriously.
Obviously the poor soul was dragged up in some backwater trailerpark where they had to get through the door first in order to get some of the corngrits for dinner!
ReplyDeleteNot well raised, well mannered, as all our children are and are going to be :)
Ignorant poopyface person!
Oh this happens so much to me! I always say out loud "Men first in North Dakota" I almost always get looked at while they process that simple line. Stupid-mofo-selfish-piece-of-jerkass-anyway!(which is what I really want to say)
ReplyDeleteHere, here! Taking advantage of pregnancy is uncool - but even in normal life waiting for someone to pass through a door before you do is NOT HARD.
ReplyDeleteI think less of people who don't say thank you when I have slowed down to make sure the door doesn't slam in their face. How hard is it to say thanks?
ReplyDeleteYou can't buy class, can you? That guy is old enough to know better.
ReplyDelete