Sunday, August 15, 2010

OK, I'm working on this thank you post but first I have to ask you a question

So, Nick went out for a run with Jordan about two hours ago.

Two hours! Actually, a little more.

This is not a man who runs for hours.

And I don't know if I'm being paranoid, but I realize I might be, because every time he's gone longer than I expect, every time I can't reach him when I try repeatedly, every time he's not where I think he'll be, it's like this:

I'm sure he's dead.

Especially when he goes out to exercise. I totally picture his weight and all those disgusting animal fats that are surely clogging his arteries getting the best of him.

And he'll come home and I'll be all, "Oh, thank God you're not dead."

He doesn't appreciate it.

But seriously.

Once you're a middle-aged man with this undisclosed amount of extra weight that is tantamount to strapping an adult Labrador Retriever around your waist, and this family history of men keeling over from heart disease, and an obese father who had major heart surgery and now has eaten his way back to his prior weight...

Well, your wife is going to worry.

So I'm just saying.

And now I don't even remember what my question was. Oh, yes. Do you do this?

Or is it just me?

19 comments:

  1. I do it all the time. I ALWAYS start to assume the worst if any one I love takes any longer than expected to do something. I calculate and re-calculate how long it should take them, then let the panic slowly build. Especially since my husband has a lovely habit of dozing off in the car when driving at night and he's been visiting his friend who lives 2 hours away. And he doesn't start the trip home until midnight. It's an awesome habit, isn't it?

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  2. I so do that. And I have since childhood. My dad was always calling to say he was on his way home, and then get distracted on the way out the door, and 2 hours later he still hadn't shown up. I started watching the clock and worrying at a very young age. Somehow my mother learned not to worry about it. After years of it, she just came to terms with the fact that he has the attention span of a gnat and didn't spend too much time stressing about it.

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  3. I am ALWAYS worrying that the people I love are dead. I am also always worrying that I am dying. Basically I'm just a massive worrier!

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  4. Donna - It's terrible, isn't it? I do this with my mom, too. I'm always sure she's fallen in the creek or gotten attacked by a raccoon.

    Lisa - Yes! I am a huuuuge fretter. My grandmother was as well, and I think I take after her.

    P - I only worry about myself dying on planes. But I worry about other people dying all the time.

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  5. Oh gosh, wait till J is a teenager and going out to parties etc. I dont sleep until Ben is home if he goes out. :S

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  6. I recently got into a relationship with a man who I am sure I am going to marry. I eat a mostly vegetarian diet with fish thrown in every once in a while. He eats meat and cheese and bread and butter. I am already in that fretting place trying not to be the nagging woman, but it's a losing battle.

    But regardless of diet, I do the dead-fret too. If he hasn't responded to a text of mine as quickly as usual, I become disconsolately convinced that he is lying by the side of the road somewhere. It's lovely, this fretting.

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  7. I worry too. Is Nick home yet? And a labrador? Really? That's a pretty big dog, and Nick doesn't look that big (besides tall) in the photos you've posted.

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  8. Oh yes I do that too. And I cannot cannot leave arguments unresolved in case that person dies before I've had time to make up. Its bloody annoying!

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  9. Yes! The what if they die/are dead curse!

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  10. i don't do this but odds are my husband feels this way about me

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  11. Aaaaand I realized I've blogged about this before. I just don't remember anything anymore. Plus we really don't change, you know?

    Go-Betty - Crap. I am sure it will be that much worse when it's about J and he's out at parties. Ugh!

    amanda - I try the not-nagging too and it works for a day or two here and there.

    And yes, dead of a coronary on the side of the road. It's terrible.

    Tia - Um, I think so? He is a huge person with these giant bones but he carries a lot of extra weight - he just gets away with a lot more since he's so big.

    And yah, he got home with the boy who was late for dinner and started melting down as soon as he saw me and then it was just a whole big evening scene.

    Miranda - It's smart about the arguments. Leaving them unresolved in case something did happen would be something you'd always regret. (As you know, which is why you do it.) But actually, I think that is a good life approach. Who wants arguments hanging out in the breeze?

    lacochran's evil twin - So you know exactly.

    kayare - It can happen! Not an unreasonable fret.

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  12. Yes, I absolutely worry and think the worst when Luke isn't back home when expected. My mind just goes - car crashes, earthquakes (in Austin?), you name it.

    Happy be-lated birthday! Luke's birthday is the 14th, so we had a weekend full of activities and I missed all the celebration on LG!

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  13. I do this all the time since Shawn got his fucking motorcycle. I'm constantly calling him (which is stupid because what is he going to do - answer his phone while driving the motorcycle?) to ask if he's dead. He does not appreciate it at all - he says I'm jinxing him.

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  14. I do this too. Alan has now gotten used to texting me when he gets to work (yep, like a pre-schooler). Right before he leaves work, I email or call him to tell him to get home safely. That's not meant as a reminder to him, who does drive safely, but to the universe. I would like him back in one piece, please, and by putting that out there, maybe...oh, who knows.
    My parents are also used to the phone calls, checking to see if everyone is home safely, if I hear sirens in our/their neighborhood during the times they might be on the road.
    Do you ask him to carry the cell when he's running, or is that too cumbersome?

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  15. Annnnnnd just to offer up the guy's POV here: lay off. I'm with Nick on this one. Being welcomed home in joy that we're not dead of an animal fat-induced heart attack is akin to us telling you, everytime we saw you in something new, "Yes, it does make your butt look fat."

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  16. I do this, but not with death. With breaking up. Every time I can't get a hold of my bf for some extended period of time when I believe he surely should be available to answer my very serious questions (shoes, cake, food etc)--I think he is going to break up with me. And then I get angry that he is not just calling me right away and getting it over with. Then he calls me and says "oh hi! I had a board meeting tonight. Would you like to go out for ice cream?"

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  17. Oh, man, fiiiiinaly, a neurotic thing I don't do! I haven't felt this normal in several weeks! ;o)

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  18. Oh! Thank you, thank you, thank you...I thought I was the only one. I am always convinced my boyfriend has fallen down the cellar stairs if he doesn't answer the phone when I call him on my way home from work. Then I wait and wait, convinced that he's dead or dying and should I go over there and check... We are moving in together soon so I think that will be better because then I will just have to come home and peek down the stairs.

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