I have been bursting into tears left and right. All morning.
Seriously. I was making coffee in the kitchen at the same time as Tej, and we disagreed about something totally insignificant - and I started to cry. Not like delicate, gentle raindrops misting my cheeks. More like sobbing gently into a paper towel trying desperately to stop before someone I would never want to see me cry entered the kitchen.
I got myself together and sniveled down a back hall to the Quad. Where Kay gave me a hug.
And then my lovely friend T, who is one of my bridesmaids and is going to sing as part of the ceremony - she's a fantastic soprano - called. She said she generally hates weddings but is so completely excited about mine, and she just can't wait.
This made me wail.
And then Maria finished the programs and handed them to me. And they're lovely. Once again, tears.
I'm so excited about committing to Nick forever and ever. I'm not scared, I'm not nervous, I'm not having second thoughts. He is exactly who I want to be with.
We have a beautiful venue. We have great catering and fantastic music lined up.
And most importantly, we have almost all of our favorite people in the world coming - some from really far away. Far like Australia and Poland and Macedonia and France far! Not to mention California and Texas!
It's all so wonderful, and I'm so excited about it.
And yet somehow today, I can't seem to stop crying.
Of course you know that you deserve every ounce of happiness that you have, and your tears are only tears of joy, right?
ReplyDeleteSo cry a whole bucket if you want.
:)
Crying is good! Let it out!
ReplyDeleteOne of the reasons we eloped was because I didn't want to cry in front of everyone. And not crying? Not an option. For me. And I'm not one of the lucky few who can look pretty while crying happy tears. Maybe you are -- or maybe you'll get all your crying out before the big day.
Slightly Disorganized - Ahh, thank you my friend. And reading that made me get all teary.
ReplyDeleteA.S. - Oh, no, I am notaprettycryer. Red, puffy. Not pretty.
Well no time like the present to get all those tears out. You'd hate to burst into tears of joy once you have your falsies on!
ReplyDeleteBig life changes = big emotion. Crying is sometimes just a way for our bodies to let it out, whatever "it" is. Doesn't have to be bad, just an overrun of natural emotions.
ReplyDeleteBe nice to yourself!
Tears can be good...energy passing in (joy) and energy passing out (tears) all are beautiful moments
ReplyDeletein this whole beautiful week! =-)
(i wish it would tell me i'm logged out before i write an ass-long comment and then it tells me No Dice!)
ReplyDeletebasically i wrote that i'm the same way. anything that is just overwhelming with emotions (no matter what kind) makes the tears pour out. saluting troops, singing the national anthem, everyone singing in church... they're not bad things, just powerful (to me anyway). and i'm an ugly crier too... the splotchyness takes almost the whole day to disappear.
since you can't stop it just roll with it. maybe you'll be all cried out by wedding day and you won't have to worry about it.
i'm always concerned that people think my crying is from sadness but i've just stopped trying to explain why talking about my family brings me to tears... you're not alone.
sometimes leading up to a big event I just get so stressed that I cry at every little thing.
ReplyDeleteI hope you start feeling better soon :-)
That is totally normal to me. My emotion were so up in the air leading to our wedding, despite me being completely and totally sure it was exactly and perfectly what I wanted, that I cried at the drop of a hat.
ReplyDeleteAnd just to warn you, for me, it went on a bit after the wedding. I think, in some ways, that was more of an emotional adjustment to suddenly having this huge thing that I'd put a lot of time and energy and thought into planning being over. Sort of like post-wedding depression. I did a lot of crying, despite how happy I was.
When you get to the wedding part, though, you're going to be so ridiculously happy!
Although you might want to see (in private) if you can get through your vows without breaking down. I made it through, "I, Sarah, take you, John.." and then blubbered through the rest so quietly that only John and the officiant could hear me. Those are the two that matter, though, so it's all good.
Ain't nothing wrong with being OMGCOMPLETELYOVERWHELMED-WELLHEREGOESTHERESTOFMYLIFE!!! Lord knows I would be. Just because you're not nervous... doesn't mean you can't be overwhelmed. Soon everything will be in place and you can just relax and enjoy the beginning of the rest of your life with the man you love. Yay!
ReplyDeleteMaiden Metallurgist - Aaagh! You are right! No crying off false eyelashes!
ReplyDeleteNicole - Thank you, sweetie. Yes, I think I just need to let the overrun out.
Ryane - It is a lot of energy in and out! Thank you - they are beautiful moments.
notsojenny - That happens to me all the time and then you lose the comment and it's so irritating to start over. I am that kind of cryer as well. Doesn't necessarily mean anything is wrong, just high emotion. Thank you.
Maxie - Yah, it's like that for me - when I get stressed, I cry. Thanks. :)
Ohh, Sarah - this makes me feel so much better. I could see myself doing exactly that, and I'm glad to know in advance that it's normal. As for vow practice...very good advice!
LivitLuvit - This is exactly what it is - I'm overwhelmed. Thank you for that. Yes, soon we'll be able to just relax! Yay!
Everyone I know, including me, went through this the week of their wedding. It's totally normal, and even as you say to yourself, "why am I crying? everything's wonderful?", you cry even more. Just a case of the Wedding Crazies. The day after the wedding, you will feel this bizarre calm that you haven't felt in ages, and it will be fabulous.
ReplyDeleteHave a spectacular day!
Big wedding week hug! It's a special time, emotions are good!
ReplyDeleteWendy - This is such a HUGE relief to hear from you. I do keep asking myself why I'm crying when everything is so great. Big hugs to you!
ReplyDeleteHKW - Thank you, sweetie! It is a special time and there is a TON of emotion flying around.
In my experience, those who were teary before the wedding, were completely dry-eyed on the day itself. So embrace those tears - they are saving you from wedding day raccoon eyes and loss of false eyelashes!
ReplyDeleteI'm so excited for you!!! I can't wait to hear all about it. Ditto feckledk, you'll be happy and blissful on Saturday!!!
ReplyDelete