Like, it's not like anything really went wrong.
But maybe you haven't slept well in a while, and pretty terribly the last few nights. And everyone you know who has had a kid is all, "Yeah. Welcome to the rest of your
And so somehow today you hate everything. Specifics might include: the weather; the things you're trying to finish up; most of your colleagues; your thighs; your itchy stomach; your back - which is constantly pulled by aforementioned stomach; your swollen feet; your maternity fucking wardrobe.
You probably don't hate puppies or rainbows, but you haven't run across either yet today.
You encouraged your husband to run over pedestrians who crossed against the light. And yet, you are likely to be one of those against-the-light crossering pedestrians later in the day. And you will most certainly hate the cars who are (legitimately) trying to go.
Once out of the car and walking those last few blocks to work, you hated the amblers in front of you. You gave the worst fuck-you-bitch look to the woman who inched in front of you into the crosswalk. She wasn't trying to get in your way - she just wanted to have a jump on the right turn when the light changed. Selfish cow.
You hate that your morning was one eternal meeting. And in that meeting, you really had to focus on not giving wilting oh-shut-up-loathe-looks.
You hate that you are hating everything. And yet, you cannot figure out how to turn it around.
It's the kind of day and mood where, by 10 am, you were tempted to do shots of grain alcohol, but even if you ever saw that as a reasonable option - and I'm almost sure it's not - it most certainly is out of the question right now. But it's not like the temptation has subsided.
That, my friends, is me today.
I imagine that the soundtrack to this day is filled with angry metal music.
ReplyDeleteYikes, I've had many of those days. And only waking up the NEXT morning can finally turn things around (maybe). Hate it when we're moody and pissed off at the world and there's no actual reason for it.
ReplyDeleteyou pretty much described my mood yesterday
ReplyDeleteI didn't do shots of grain alcohol but I did eat a massive bowl of pasta with cheese for dinner
it's pretty much the same thing
Lisa, I totally love you. I can't keep up with people who are too happy, I like to have a drink (so sorry you can't right now!) and bitch about life...in a humorous way...sort of like misery loves company, except that we aren't miserable, we're just a little cynical and don't like putting on a cheerful facade.
ReplyDeleteI'm not going to try to cheer you up, because you are ENTITLED to be grouchy. I encourage a full-blown wallow, actually. Find as many ways as possible to express your irritation.
ReplyDeleteFor me, it helps if after I do all of this, I curl up on the couch with a good book and a blanket and talk to NO ONE for the rest of the evening.
Sarah - I hadn't thought about it, but yes, probably.
ReplyDeleteBeach Bum - I know. It feels so out of control! And all you can do is just go to bed and hope tomorrow wakes up sunnier.
Hillary - It's a dreadful feeling, isn't it? Pasta and cheese sounds fantastic right now.
Raw Food - Oh, thank you. It is true - the always happies are hard to keep up with. And you have to have some kind of dark side for me to really connect with you.
Dagny - Thank you. That's very constructive. As for tonight, we do have new Dexters to watch, and a little vicarious serial killing? That really appeals.
those days are around more often than i'd care to admit
ReplyDeletethey suck
I guess it wouldn't help to tell you I felt the same way, left work, and am sitting at home drinking a Pacifico?
ReplyDeleteNah, didn't think so.
I absolutely have those days. On multiple occaisions I look at my hubby and vehemently proclaim, "I hate every person who is not you and me, anything besides us is the WORST." Then I feel a bit better.
ReplyDeleteYep. And then I get sick of the sound of my own voice in my head but it will not shut up. I sometimes want to break up with myself when I'm like that.
ReplyDeleteAlso, it's NOT the rest of your life.
That kind of sounds like me EVERY day when I go to work. Sorry your day is like that today. Call in pregnant, I mean sick tomorrow.
ReplyDeleteI am SO glad to hear there is another person on the planet who has days where she *DESPISES* everyone around her! I thought *I* was the only one!! Until this all subsides, may I recommend Giffords swiss chocolate ice cream:
ReplyDeleteGifford's Locations & Hours:
Bethesda
7237 Woodmont Avenue
Bethesda, Maryland 20814
Bethesda & Woodmont Avenues
301-907-3436
Hours:
Sunday - Thursday 12noon - 10:00pm
Friday & Saturday 12noon - 10:30pm
Chevy Chase:
21 Wisconsin Circle
Chevy Chase, Maryland 20815
Wisconsin Ave. & Western Ave.
301-652-8965
Hours:
Sunday - Thursday 12noon - 9:30pm
Friday & Saturday 12noon - 10:00pm
Rockville:
Rockville Town Square
100 Gibbs Street
Rockville, MD 20850
301-315-2002
Hours:
Sunday- Thursday 12noon-10pm
Friday & Saturday – 12noon- 10:30pm
Downtown DC
555 11th Street, N.W.
Washington, DC 20004
At E Street & 10th
202-347-7755
Hours:
Sunday - Thursday 12noon - 10:00pm
Friday & Saturday 12noon - 10:30pm
LJ, may we all have friends like you!
ReplyDeleteAs for me, I am not feeling super either today. Also very hungry, wtf, which sucks b/c I'm already feeling bloated. So chugging water, trying not to eat, counting down the hours till i can get out of here.
I'll have a shot of grain alcohol for you Lisa.
Hormones are hell! That's my explanation when there's nothing more reasonable to blame it on. In your case, I think it's more than understandable.
ReplyDeleteThe sleep thing may take care of the rest of that icky shit feeling- have you gone to a chiropractor yet? Because I think you're in need of an emergency appointment.
ReplyDeletenotsojenny - They do suck, they really do.
ReplyDeleteLiLu - While I wish it were me, and I am battling huge ENVY, mostly I'm glad one of us is.
lustyreader - Hahaha! You know, it's true that on the drive in this morning I pretty much hated everyone who wasn't him or me. The circle of non-hate does include others around me, but they're in the minority.
Susan - Yes! I'm all, shutupshutupshutup and I just can't! Grrr.
Jules - I may just have to do that. That is a great suggestion.
LJ - This is a delight. I love you and your detailed ice cream information.
Brett - She really is cool, isn't she?
I totally appreciate you doing a shot for me. :)
J - Well, yah. There are those annoying hormones flying around.
Mary - No, I haven't yet. After the osteopath got me on a better path, I've been OK. But now my stomach flops when I lie on my side, and it pulls the side of my back. I need to get a stomach pillow.
If you possibly can send someone else to buy one today- looking at the various selections might be irritating enough to send you over the edge.
ReplyDeleteI second the recommendations to wallow in it... I also second the suggestions of chocolate. Mmmm... chocolate.
ReplyDeleteMary - THAT made me laugh. You are precisely right about my state.
ReplyDeleteVVK - Have been wallowing. And nipped out to get a Milky Way. Because the CVS near my office has NO Cadbury eggs! What is WRONG with the world?!?
I am having that EXACT day and am not pregnant and will therefore take you up on your very wise suggestion of grain alcohol.
ReplyDeleteI can't imagine a better time to have a day like that.
ReplyDeleteAnd about that whole welcome to the rest of your life thing? Maybe yes, maybe no. Like all things, it cycles.
And then they grow up and get accepted to George Washington University!!!! (Now the Dancer has motivation to work the pole.)
Oh, and a pre-emptive thought - until you've actually heard yourself scream the word "QUIET!!!!!" at your child you really haven't crossed the threshold to that place which will REQUIRE grain alcohol. No mixers. No shame.
Hope today is better.
It is inevitably on a day like that when the guy at the gas station or in the sandwich shop or whatever orders me to smile. Guy doesn't know how close he comes to having his intestines ripped out through his nostrils.
ReplyDeleteI think you need to cash in a 'I am not feeling well and need to leave early' chip and call it a day. Everyone deserves a mental-health day (to rant or run over peds...either, perhaps!!?) and in fact, there are actually Two of you now...er, sort-of, so I say go. =-)
ReplyDeleteAnd then do what Dagney suggested: go home and talk to no one except your husband. Shut out the rest of the maggots. =-)