And in my defense, I hadn't thought about stabbing Nick in months.
So over the weekend, we went out to dinner with Nick's partners and their spouses.
They know me by now. This is the same group I went out with and bellowed about my porn name in a very quiet, conservative dining establishment.
And yet, I still manage to surprise them.
All of us have children, and we were all talking about new babies and how much work they are. And I said, "You know, for about six months after Jordan was born, I'd lay in bed mentally dividing up the furniture and thinking about stabbing Nick."
It turns out this is a surprising thing to say, and in fact, while everyone has their challenges,it had never occurred to any of them to stab their spouse.
So after they'd all recovered, talk turned to house renovations. And the elevator. Which should start going in tomorrow, you guys! Anyway, that's the rumor.
One of the men said, "You know, when you sell, I don't know how much of the elevator cost your going to recoup."
Nick replied, "It doesn't matter. We're going to die in that house."
The woman to his left said, "Particularly if Lisa stabs you."