Tuesday, March 06, 2012

Completely freaking out

Update: 3 pm.

The midwife said, in a nutshell: The baby is FINE, totally fine. It's a virus (which you guys said). There are lots going around. Eat what you can, sleep, and stay home tomorrow if you can - one, to rest, and two, not to spread it around.

Also: Leave Google the hell alone.

In further good news, the kid's heart sounds great, and she is now head down!!! I felt her squirming a lot last night - partly because I couldn't sleep and partly because I kept obsessively checking to make sure she wasn't dead.

My personal theory is that all the organ upheaval from the vomiting flipped her right over.

You all are the BEST. So sweet and kind and supportive. Huuuuge hugs to you.

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Let me start by saying that I have a scheduled midwife appointment at 1 pm, and I am so very grateful. Hopefully she'll be on time, and so I only have 90 more minutes of absolute hysteria.

Because I am freaking the fuck out.

I spent last night vomiting violently. I assumed I had the same stomach virus thing as Betty, but hers lasted a couple days. Me, I'm exhausted, but haven't thrown up in hours.

So Nick called and suggested food poisoning. What did I eat yesterday?

Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck. How am I so stupid? Tuna salad from sandwiches that were brought into our office for a meeting.

A perfect way to get listeriosis, which can kill your baby. Or just cause birth defects, premature labor, and what have you. Seriously, if you are pregnant and would like to make yourself clawing-the-walls-insane, go ahead and google food poisoning and pregnancy.

Not only am I exhausted and feel like hell, but I'm also convinced that I'm singlehandedly responsible for having done irreparable damage to our kid.

Fuck.

31 comments:

  1. Oh LG :( I know nothing I say could make you feel better right now, but I'm sending fierce, fierce hugs.

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  2. I second Moosie's comment...hugs to you :(

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  3. you more than anyone deserve to catch a break. I hope that this is nothing more then an anxiety blip on an otherwise uneventful pregancy. HUGS

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  4. I thought I had food poisoning a week ago. Turns out it's norovirus. And it's going around. The Washington Post had a story on it the other day. It sounds like that's what you have. I hate to hear this, but I'm pulling for you and hoping it moves through you quickly. It's no joke.

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  5. sending you hugs and kisses...love you and that baby...and pray that you are both feeling better soon xoxoxo

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  6. Big hugs to you. I'm sorry you're feeling shitty. I'm sure the chances of harm to your baby are very very slim, especially this far along. Thinking of you. xxxxx

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  7. Hugs! Sending good thoughts!!

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  8. i am certain that you and the offspring are fine. better yet? also sending hugs and much love!

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  9. Holy Cow! You are being hugged and prayed for!I'm lighting a healing, healthy candle right now!

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  10. Oh, no, Lisa - I hope to hear soon that everything is okay. I'm sending out warm soul light and positive healing vibes, along with big hugs for you and little bump.

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    1. Yay! That's great news all round. If the "flip side" :-) of norovirus is a heads-down baby girl, then there really is a silver lining to the cloud.

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  11. I'm betting on norovirus too, it does feel like food poisoning and has been running around this town like wildfire. I sure hope the midwife can get you some IV fluids that get you and baby girl all primed up and feeling better. I know it's easy to get all crazed from the internet, and you worked so hard for this baby, but we are sending so much love and light that everything is ok. xoxoxo

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  12. Listeriosis is very rare, so please try not to worry. But don't hesitate to go in if you have a feeling you should. At best, they send you home with peace of mind. At worst, you get admitted and have a couple days to relax and recoup.

    Sending good thoughts your way.

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  13. Ah! Relief! Huge! Yay! Thank you so much for the update.
    ((more hugs))

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  14. head down, head down, head down, YAH!!!!!!!!! keep doing what you're doing, you're doing a great job. and stop stressing, and stop googling dammit! ;-) big belly rubs, inversions and hammocking to you, luv soph

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  15. YAY! So glad to hear the freak out is over!

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  16. So glad to hear all is well!!! I've been sending lots of positive thoughts your way today!

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  17. Thanks for the update! All good news. Freaking Google anyway!

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  18. Glad to hear that all is well. Take care of yourself, get some rest, and stay away from the Google. xoxo

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  19. Virus. Totally. Just had it in our house.,.terrible cramps, vomiting, the works!

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  20. So glad to hear you're okay!

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  21. huggage to you and your girl:)

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  22. thanks for the update, hope you're feeling better soon x

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  23. Dr. Google will have you in the morgue for a papercut, so NEVER do that!

    Glad to hear that everything will be fine. And YAY for a head down girlie!

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  24. Look how many people have been sending love waves your way! Bless you, bless you, bless you!

    And I knowq this is nothing in compared, but I did try to vote for your blog the other day, 11:00 pm pst, but voting was already cut off. Next year we'll have to be ready earlier for the vote. That is, if you have the energy to still blog...betcha will. I really won't be surprised; you're so, so amazing, you know that? mmmuuuaaah!

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  25. I am so SO SO glad that everything checked out okay. xoxo

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  26. Whew! I'm so glad I read the update first, because crap, how scary was that! Hooray for a head down baby girl, and hooray for it being just a virus. Hugs!

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  27. Sorry I didn't see this sooner, but I'm glad everything is okay. x

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