Wednesday, April 25, 2007

Well, No, Not Just This Moment

Thursday night, in the middle of the night, three friends and I were in an ugly but private waiting room of the ER, which is in the basement of the hospital

They're very kind to you when you come in under those circumstances. A social worker meets you, and you get taken to a private room. It makes it a little scarier, because you wonder if you've been sequestered so that when the doctor arrives to tell you the worst, nobody hears you howling.

But as you know, the doctor did not deliver the worst, and so while my mom was with my dad, we were trying to contact my brother, his wife, others. And none of us had any cell phone reception.

There was a phone in the room, but you could only make local calls, and neither my brother or his wife have local cell numbers.

Luckily, my friend A had a phone card. She handed it to another friend to read off the 800-number while I dialed.

So I pushed the numbers as she read them. And was waiting for the prompt, "For English..."

...when the phone voice said, "Are you horny?"

This was unlike any AT&T card I'd ever used! And instead of being horrified, I gave it a sincere second of thought. The hell? What is wrong with me?

I was still waiting for instructions. "What do I do?"

My friend A said, "Press 1."

So pressed 1. And the voice said, "Are you looking for hot, wet girls?"

Even at this point, it didn't quite register, I'm embarrassed to admit. I was still waiting to put in the PIN.

So I turned to my friends and said, "They asked if I'm looking for hot, wet girls?"

"Hang up! Hang up! You dialed phone porn! Do you want to get us kicked out of here?"



  1. Number please.

    ...just kidding. Sorta.

  2. I don't know what made me laugh harder; the fact that you dialed a 900# or the fact that you kept going along with the prompts.


  3. Glad to see that things are getting better and you can make jokes now :)

  4. I CANNOT believe you hung up on me. How rude!

  5. Its moments like these where you quote Homer Simpson:



  6. OMG, this is hilarious! Funny how sometimes humor is delivered when you need to smile the most:)

  7. I-66 - Um. I'll find the phone card and get back to you.

    INPY - How ridiculous is that? And how much further would I have gone with it if they hadn't said to hang up?

    HIN - I'm feeling more optimistic, for sure. Thanks.

    FK - Oh! If I'd known it were you, I'd have asked if you wanted to join the party!

    VVK - It was definitely a doh! moment.

    Kell - Yes - absolutely. And you know how sometimes it's laugh or cry, and you're so glad to laugh?


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