Monday, February 09, 2009

Two unrelated reasons not to pick your nose in public and to wash your hands after traversing bridges

I'm offering up two completely unrelated things that were brought to, and captured, my attention recently.

The first is a visual adventure and completely non-bizarro. And the second is all about sex. With objects.

A friend of mine sent me a link to this site with this amazingly detailed photo of the crowd at the inauguration.

You've got to check it out. Click on the picture. And zoom in and zoom in and zoom in.

It's one of the coolest things I've ever seen. While I was in the way way wayback of the crowd, behind the Washington Monument, a number of people I know had tickets. So I feel like if I had time to look at the entire picture, eventually I'd find someone I know.

Even if not, it's just incredible. The detail is astounding.

Now for the sex.

So, I'm generally of the opinion that if you're not doing anything with children or animals, and you're not hurting anyone who doesn't want you to, then what you get up to in your private time is all fine. And this holds true for me with the following.

But this story on Jezebel about Objectum Sexuals is fas-ci-na-ting.

Because it's about this small group of people - all women - who fall in love with objects. Like fences. And the Eiffel Tower. And the Golden Gate bridge.

And when I say they fall in love with them - they fall in love. They imbue them with personalities. They assign gender to these objects. They have sex with them.

One woman becomes a world-class archer because she falls so deeply in love with her bow. In fact, her relationship with her ex-boyfriend ended because she liked the bow more than she liked him. And ultimately, the bow got the sex that the boyfriend wasn't getting.

While she and the bow were hot and heavy (their relationship has since cooled), the sex, according to her, was fantastic.

Honestly.

There's a short video on the site that explains and has brief interviews, and there's a link to a longer documentary.

I found watching it kind of uncomfortable - a mix of feeling embarrassed for them and feeling sad, because clearly relationships with objects is just safer than relationships with humans. But I don't think these people are necessarily unhappy, so who am I to feel sad for them?

There is, however, this piece that makes me twitch.

I am not fastidious, but I feel a lot more comfortable with the idea of "love" with personal objects you store in your home and keep clean than with amusement park rides or the Empire State Building.

17 comments:

  1. I feel that same way about pints of Chubby Hubby.

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  2. This is one of those moments when you know that you shouldn't click on the link, touch the hot stove, enter the door that says keep out. And yet I clicked anyway.

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  3. FreckledK - I am going to go out on a limb and say that I'm quite certain it's not the same kind of relationshp for you.

    restaurantrefugee - Noooo! One must always touch the hot stove! Just to be sure!

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  4. Man Lisa! Both items are fascinating! Now you've got me wondering about a facebook group a parisian friend of mine started, called "Friends of the Eiffel Tower" . . .

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  5. Sarah - Did you watch? Did you see the caressing and making out and such?

    LJ - I know, aren't they!? As for your friend, I wouldn't worry, since the group isn't "Lovers of the Eiffel Tower," right?

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  6. Oh. I'll never be able to not think of this when sightseeing. Ever. Also, thanks for linking to that picture, it is amazing.

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  7. I'm in that picture. :-)

    If you zoom in on the base of the camera tower on the right side of the image, and then move up and to the left in the last row before the fence... you'll see me

    Hurray for volunteering!

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  8. I saw that last week- VILE, but more sad. The one that got me was the Eiffel Tower... BEEN THERE, TOUCHED THAT!!! Ugh.

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  9. Um, wow. And I thought I loved my stereo equipment but that doesn't make me want to hump a sub woofer or insert a speaker wire. wow.

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  10. Maiden Metallurgist - I know. Although there are very few of them in the world, and a big attraction seems to be steel. So old Roman stone bridges out to be fine, don't you think?

    VVK - I found you! And weren't you glad you weren't picking your nose in public? This picture reminded me that there are probably a zillion cameras around town, and somewhere, someone has a picture of me adjusting my underwear or something.

    LiLu - Oh, yes, you are precisely right, and it makes me all cringey.

    JoLee- Exactly.

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  11. yes. ew. I am scarred.

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  12. I really love my vibrator.

    What?!

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  13. If only I loved my gear shift. With my damn driver's side door broken, I get intimate with the stick shift every time I climb over to the driver's seat from the passenger's side.

    I may as well enjoy it, no?

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  14. 1. I looked for a LONG time to see if I could find any nose pickers in that crowd...couldn't. But Bush had quite a scowl on his face...and a comfy chair.

    2. That may be the weirdest story I've EVER heard....and I teach 5th grade so I've heard a lot. But that's just STRANGE!!!!

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  15. OK, seriously? I opened the Jezebel link, took one look at the lady on the fence and closed out the article. That was waaaaaaaay too much for me on a Monday. :)

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  16. I am genuinely confused. I just don't get it.

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