It's been a while since I participated in TMI Thursday. Today seemed like as good a day as any.
And Dad, better you skipped this one. You won't be happy.
Maude made up the flashing game years ago.
We found it highly entertaining throughout our 20s. And maybe a little beyond. Truth is, I can't promise we've matured to the point where we wouldn't still do it, but now we live continents apart.
She's the person who used to push me into the most ridiculousness. I miss that in my life, I really do.
The main skills you need are the following. Wait, first of all, you need breasts - which I realize aren't skills. They don't need to be big - our little cupcakes worked fine. But you need some.
Starting there, then you need lightening quick reflexes, and the ability to scan a room in an instant. Or anyway, I imagine they'd be helpful.
Because if you lack those, you really just need the ability to shrug at the noticer and laugh at yourself.
The game is simple. You catch the eye of your friend. You then look around the room, waiting for the moment where nobody else is looking at you. And when that moment happens, you flash - shirt, bra, all up - the other person. Very quickly.
You then return to normal, pick up your drink, do whatever you were doing before. As if nothing out of the ordinary had every happened.
And here I should mention that we would do this at parties. Around adults. Not, like, at the mall on a Sunday.
You're winning if you're the last person who flashed. You're really winning if it's a crowded crowd and you get away with it.
Although you are not competing for anything, you feel slightly smug if you went last and suddenly the situation gets difficult.
It's about getting away with something in public. Something that can really shock other people. I suppose, if it comes down to it, it's about exhibitionism (me?). But if nobody catches you, you're not really exposing yourself.
There is, however, always the danger that someone will. I learned that guys tend to find it hilarious and women tend to disapprove. I did once apologize to the friend of a boyfriend, who really wasn't supposed to see me, and who looked so shaken I really felt the need to.
Years later I got to know him and was able to harass him. Because really? Who has to apologize to a straight guy for showing him her boob?
I'd say the only time I was really embarrassed was when a woman at a party caught me, and then said, loudly enough for the whole room to hear, "WHY did you do that?"
My shirt was back down before the whole room turned and looked at me.
I don't remember what I did, besides cringe.
But really. What kind of response can be appropriate in that situation?