Tuesday, June 18, 2019
I mean, it's only hair but each follicle represents some large percentage of my self esteem
Today is a better hair day than many. It looks shiny and is staying flat. I've had a lot of weird poof curl hair days with this cut and the humidity.
So now that it's a good day I'm having second thoughts. But then tomorrow I could hate it all over again.
I used to chop my hair relentlessly when I was in a bad place. It got shorter and shorter as my mental state deteriorated.
I don't think this is what's happening.
Although I did mention the hair cutting to my friend Tosha last week, and how I feel like it might just feel so good to get rid of all of it, and she said, "Do it!" And then she leaned close and said, "You're going through something, huh?"
I guess? Maybe? I didn't think so?
Because I have to talk about all of these things endlessly with everyone, I mentioned it to Kris and Wendy. I also mentioned how my self-esteem is so wrapped up in my hair, and it's easier to have more hair than less.
Kris totally sympathized. Oh my god yes with the self-esteem. For Wendy, her hair is just her hair.
I should point out that she is always willing to listen endlessly about hair trials and tribulations. Hair just isn't one of her triggers.
So I got this asymmetrical haircut a couple months ago, but it's not doing the trick. I thought I could maybe have half short but still have the long side to tuck behind my ear.
I could have my cake and eat it too.
No. And as I said, the weird and random poofs that I can't seem to manage really get my goat.
But also, apparently, I might be going through something.
Plus, it could be super easy to travel with shortyshort hair. In fact, I'm considering using shampoo bars like Dr. Bronners, in my small attempt to reduce plastic.
How easy would it be to just travel with a bar? And not have to hair dryer dry your hair?
Or I might hate how I look and be very self conscious in a whole lot of unfamiliar situations.
I think I'm going through something.
I'll let you know.
Posted by Lemon Gloria on Tuesday, June 18, 2019