Friday, January 11, 2008

I have got to stop licking telephone poles

So everyone and their dog has a cold. And now I have one, too. It makes me really grumpy, this cold-having. And for some reason feeling bad gives me this annoying desire to place blame.

"You gave me your cold." I say this in a very accusatory fashion. To someone who is nothing but nice to me.

"That’s not my cold. Your symptoms are different. Plus you'd have gotten it a week ago."

"OK, fine..."

He's right, I think. It's not his cold. "So you think maybe it’s because I lick telephone poles on my walk to work?"

"Could definitely be."

"And you know, every once in a while, I do like to lick a car or two."

"The door handles, right?"

"How’d you know?"

"That’s the part that tastes the best."

He's so totally right.


  1. Oh no, you too! Just got over the worst cold personally experienced and have never been so happy to be able to smell the dog and taste Kung Pao shrimp.

    Rest over the weekend and feel better soon.

  2. You know what really tastes good AND makes you sick?

    You guessed it. The flusher on the toilet.

    They're especially tasty in gas station restrooms along interstates.

    (feel better)

  3. I favor bus stop benches, myself.

  4. I like to blame other people for all of my colds and illnesses as well. I mean, it had to come from SOMEWHERE right?

  5. HKW - Glad you are feeling better. Whatever is going around really sucks.

    DCup - Hahahahahaha! So gross!

    Amisare - Equally disgusting. Excellent!

    Nicole - Yes! Exactly!


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