Wednesday, October 29, 2014

20 things toddlers do not consider viable reasons for anything

  1. Because nobody walks outside naked. 
  2. It's too cold to wear that.
  3. It's too hot to wear that.
  4. It's dirty because you wore it yesterday. And the day before.
  5. Oh, but it's so cute!
  6. I paid a lot of money for that damn dress!
  7. Because it doesn't belong to us.
  8. Because you might fall and hurt yourself.
  9. Nobody else is eating the wood chips.
  10. Rats probably pooped on those wood chips.
  11. We're about to have dinner.
  12. You already had a treat.
  13. Because ice cream is always cold.
  14. It's too late for another story.
  15. It's the middle of the night. 
  16. Mama is very tired.
  17. Because it will help you grow up big and strong.
  18. Mmm! It's delicious!
  19. Because nobody likes to have a mouthful of water squirted at them.
  20. And also that bath water is full of soap and butt germs.

4 comments:

  1. Oh the butt germs in the bath water! How many times have I said that one!?

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    1. The mouthfuls of soapy butt germ water drive me crazy. Crazy.

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  2. I especially like # 9 on wood chips, 13 regarding ice cream and 16 Mama is tired. Because you might fall and hurt yourself worries me but I guess kids are kids. Yesterday my 4yo niece said "I'm going to be 2 big sisters"...her Mom replied..."You mean you're going to be a big sister to two"...and replying back to Mom: "Yes, that's what I said". Toddlers are the most logical illogical people on the planet.

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    Replies
    1. Heather, apparently their little frontal lobes that process logic aren't formed at all. So logic is pointless with those little lunatics. The because you might fall...works here and there. But climbing on the arms and back of the easy chair is so tempting. Climbing on everything is so tempting. And it's only a problem if you fall...

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