Monday, January 04, 2010

Setting the record straight

The problem with me is that I'm an unreliable narrator.

Also, I tend to say "the thing about me," or "the problem with me" - as if there's THE thing or THE problem. But saying "A problem with me" just doesn't work. Plus, being an unreliable narrator, whatever the problem is at the time is THE problem.

At least I recognize this. Which makes it less of a problem. Or the problem.


I recently wrote this post about how Nick is all ambley and smell the rosey and it drives me crazy because I am so not.

And then someone commented about that time I got caught sticking my nose in someone's bush. And I was thinking, well, yeah, but those were lilacs. I always have to smell the lilacs.

But I do stop and smell the roses. I just do it quickly. Walkwalkwalk, stop briefly, stick nose in rose, walkwalkwalk.

Not the same. In my mind.

But the thing about me is that whatever I am feeling at the moment is absolutely how things are. So when I'm cold, I can't even remember what it's like to be warm. And then once I'm warm, I forget about the dread cold.

(This leads Nick to say that I have a very temporal approach to the world. I didn't connect this type of thing with an inability to have a 10-year plan, but actually, it all ties together.)

So the other day, Nick addressed me as "Lisa" - which he rarely does. I pointed this out.

And he said, "What I never call you is 'Lis'."

"You don't?"

"No. And in your blog, you always have me calling you 'Lis.' And I don't."

He was clearly annoyed by the misrepresentation.

While I do hang on his every word, clearly I miss a few here and there. Because the fact is, he has plenty of nicknames for me, but never calls me Lis.

So if you're reading back through any old posts in which I relay conversation with Nick, please do as follows: Anywhere you see "Lis" please insert "Honey Chinese Cheese."

For this I have no explanation. And that's the gosh-darned truth.


  1. That was a little bit of a whirlwind but I think I got it! The nickname you mentioned is precious - so original and great. I think the lack of a 10 year plan is common for Leo's - Luke's birthday is the day after yours and he is the same way. Hey - totally random but I found a new brussel sproats recipe and thought of you - will email you if you like?

  2. My philosophy is that lilacs don't really require lengthy smelling to enjoy. They're more of the drive-by smelling kind of flower. You don't *really* have to slow your roll to stop and smell the lilacs.

    Here's my theory on the Lis thing... It seems like people with longer names always seem to have this shortened version that's said in this really affectionate way. Like the person saying it is so comfortable with you that it's just a waste to say your whole long, formal name. But when your name is Lisa, there's not much of that in your life. Hence hearing those near and dear to you calling you "Lis" even when they're not.

  3. HKW - YES! I would love the recipe!

    As for this post...I think my brain is still in holiday mode. Sorry if it didn't make sense!

    Lisa - You are absolutely right. I love it when people call me Lis.

    As for the drive-by smelling - what an excellent way to put it!

  4. hahaha
    i love the idea that he's been stewing on this little thing but he's too nice to ever say anything about it and it finally steamed out of him. so cute!

  5. I like that it matters to Nick. :)

    And Honey Chinese Cheese is a nickname that would fit in well around my house (when I first wrote that, I put it as Hiney Chinese Cheese!). Clearly I am still recovering from the holidays as well.

  6. I think my husband is very upset with me about many of my "misinterpretations."


    And I try, really hard to smell the roses, but roses have thorns and you have to be careful with this kind of stuff. Use some "stategery" where roses are involved, you know?

  7. My husband rarely calls me by my actual name, too! We usually use random endearments (honey, babe, sweetie, etc) although we have specific pet names when we are being super cutesy (Julia & Joe = Juju & Jojo) but anyway, when he DOES call me by my actual name, it makes me feel all's just so strange to hear him say it!

  8. Happy New Year to you Lisa, Nick and Jordan. Cayching up with your blog today and a have a few suggestions for the replacement of profanities you blogged about yesterday.
    I use Gobshite, as in you stupid GOBSHITE. normally yelled at someone.
    Another I use that gets people chuckling is the phrase
    'For crying down the kicthen sink' instead of jesus fucking christ!! or how about buggerybollocks thats another I use.
    I swear far too much and am trying to temper my use of the english language a little.
    Oh and as far as new years reolutions go, 2 years ago I decided instead of trying to give something up I would take a positive approach and resolve to do more of something I enjoy instead of giving something up. Last year I resolved to kiss was a fun year for me :)


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